This week in the world’s #1 newsletter on leadership communication:
- “What should I do with my hands?”
- On the Show: Influence that Works
- Good Read: The Strategic Enemy
What should I do with my hands?
It’s the number 1 question I get in coachings:
What should I do with my hands?
Non-verbal communication matters a great deal.
It makes you a better speaker. And if your body and words are not aligned, people believe your body.
Researchers even found that investors were 12% more interested in investing when speakers frequently used gestures.
So here’s everything you need to know about hand gestures in 1 minute:
Don’t do this:
1/ Let your hands dangle by your sides
2/ Raise them above your head (unless you are Tony Robbins)
3/ Repeat the same gesture over and over - like karate chopping wood
4/ Finger quotation marks - hard cringe!
5/ Signs of nervousness: scratching your face, wringing your hands, playing with your hair or wedding band.
This can be good or bad:
1/ Hands in your pockets
I never use this while delivering a talk because it lacks energy and weakens presence.
But during Q&A? I intentionally do it. It signals calm, control, and a quiet confidence that says: “Ask me anything. I’m not rattled.”
2/ The figleaf aka the Merkel (named after the former German chancellor)
It’s a bit stiff but works for some people.
So how do you command the space around you?
Simple: Let Your Hands Tell Your Story.
That’s it. Just use your hands to emphasize your message.
Apart from that I’m not prescriptive – your gestures should feel natural. Personal and cultural differences matter more than rigid rules.
Here are 4 gestures to get you started:
1/ Up or down: Raise or lower your hand to show something is rising or falling, e.g. revenue or sales.
2/ Signal togetherness with a wide open-arm gesture to connect with the audience.
3/ 1-2-3: If you make three points, show us by counting with your fingers.
4/ The salt pincher: use it to emphasize a crucial point.
Bonus tip: On video calls, raise your hands a little higher so people can see them.
BTW, we covered public speaking in the Speak Like a CEO Academy just yesterday. If you are interested in joining me for the Winter 2025 cohort starting next month, join the waitlist (no risk, nothing to pay now).
THE SHOW
Influence That Works
I do a weekly show to help you become a top 1% communicator. Subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or Youtube.
To influence someone, we have to change their minds – or so we have been told. But what if that’s exactly why your message keeps falling flat?
To find out how to be influential in today’s world, I speak with Steve Martin, one of the world’s top minds in behavioral science and longtime business partner of Robert Cialdini, the godfather of persuasion.
Steve has spent 20+ years translating psychology into action and is the author of “Messengers” and his new book “Influence at Work”.
Here’s what we break down:
- How you can influence behaviors without changing believes
- What makes people trust you – especially in an era of deepfakes, AI, and "super-distrusters"
- How to become a messenger worth listening to, not just another voice in the feed.
Listen to the full episode here:
BOOK RECOMMENDATION
Pick the Right Fight
Does your brand have a Strategic Enemy?
Consumers are overwhelmed by choices and inundated with 10,000 marketing messages a day.
Yet most personal and business brands continue to focus on "being better" rather than on what really matters – being different and distinctive in the mind of the consumer.
The solution, says Laura Ries, is to pick a fight, or more politely: position yourself in opposition to your strategic enemy. Like Coke vs Pepsi, Nike vs Adidas or Android vs iPhone.
Your strategic enemy can also be an issue people care about like pollution, waste or a disease.
Why does it work to have an opponent? Because the mind understands opposition faster than superiority.
Identifying your strategic enemy forces you to clearly define what you are not, which enables consumers to more easily understand who you are.
The book just dropped – and next week, I’m sitting down with Laura to dive deep. Can’t wait to share it with you!
Have an inspired weekend,
Oliver
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